Why Grief Comes in Waves (And How to Ride Them)

Grief is not a straight line. It’s not a checklist of stages or a timeline you’re supposed to follow. It’s messy, unpredictable, and often shows up when you least expect it.

One moment you feel okay—maybe even joyful—and the next, you’re knocked over by a wave of sadness, longing, or anger so strong it takes your breath away.

That doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. It means you’re grieving.

Grief Comes in Waves Because Love Doesn’t Disappear

Grief isn’t just pain—it’s love with nowhere to go. And like the ocean, it moves in cycles. Sometimes it’s calm. Sometimes it crashes.

You might feel okay for days, weeks, even months… and then something-a scent, a song, a memory—brings it all back. This is normal. It’s not a setback. It’s a continuation of your love, your processing, your healing.

You’re Not Starting Over—You’re Moving Through It

When a wave of grief hits, it can feel like you’re back at the beginning. But you’re not.

Every time you ride a wave, you build emotional muscle. You learn to hold the sadness, let it move through you, and come back up for air. That’s not regression. That’s resilience.

What Triggers the Waves?

• Anniversaries and milestones

• Changes in routine or environment

• Unexpected reminders

• Moments of stillness (when you finally slow down)

You don’t have to prepare for every wave. But knowing they’ll come helps you meet them with compassion instead of fear.

How to Ride a Wave of Grief

• Pause and breathe. 

  You don’t need to “fix” the pain—just feel it.

  
  

• Let yourself cry, rage, or rest. 

  Suppression makes the waves harder to ride.

  
  

• Talk to someone safe. 

  Grief gets lighter when it’s shared.

  
  

• Use grounding tools. 

  Touch something soft, breathe deeply, or hold a keepsake.

  
  

• Don’t rush yourself. 

  Grief doesn’t work on deadlines.

Sometimes the wave will pass quickly. Other times, it’ll stay a while. Either way, you will come up for air.

You Don’t Have to Ride the Waves Alone

Grief comes in waves and can be isolating, but you don’t have to carry it by yourself.

Whether you’ve lost a person, a relationship, a version of your life, or a piece of your identity, your pain is real. And healing doesn’t mean forgetting—it means learning how to live with the love and the loss.

Book a free consultation today if you’re looking for a soft place to land. You don’t need to have the “right” words or timeline. Just come as you are.