Why You Can’t Meditate (And Other Myths About Mindfulness)
- Fika Mental Health
- Oct 26
- 2 min read
You sit down, close your eyes, and within seconds your brain is running wild: grocery lists, old conversations, worries about tomorrow. Then comes the frustration: Why can’t I just be present?
If meditation feels impossible, it’s not because you’re doing it wrong—it’s because your nervous system might not feel safe enough to slow down yet.
For many people, especially those healing from trauma or high stress, stillness can feel threatening. The body interprets quiet moments as danger, not peace.
The Science of Why Stillness Feels Unsafe
When you’ve lived in chronic stress, your body adapts to constant alertness. Adrenaline and cortisol become your “normal.” So when you try to meditate, your nervous system might panic because it doesn’t know how to function without tension.
This reaction isn’t failure—it’s physiology. Your body is trying to protect you.
Signs your nervous system may not feel ready for stillness:
Racing thoughts or restlessness during mindfulness.
Feeling numb or disconnected when you try to meditate.
Sudden memories or emotions surfacing when you slow down.
A sense of “checking out” or zoning out instead of relaxing.
The Myth of the Perfect Mind
Mindfulness isn’t about clearing your thoughts or reaching enlightenment—it’s about noticing what’s happening inside you with compassion.
Trauma can make that awareness uncomfortable, so your mind tries to escape. That’s okay. Every time you notice and return, even briefly, you’re strengthening your brain’s ability to stay grounded in the present moment.
What to Do When Meditation Doesn’t Work
If traditional meditation feels impossible, here are trauma-informed alternatives that might help:
Try Movement-Based Mindfulness- Yoga, stretching, walking, or even mindful cleaning can help you access calm through motion. You’re teaching your body safety while staying gently active.
Use Sensory Anchors- Focus on one sense—like noticing textures, sounds, or smells. Sensory mindfulness can ground you without overwhelming internal awareness.
Shorten the Practice- Two minutes of mindful breathing or noticing your surroundings is enough. Consistency matters more than duration.
Co-Regulate First- Calm connection with another person or pet can help regulate your nervous system, making mindfulness safer to attempt afterward.
Reframe “Mindfulness” Entirely- Some days, mindfulness looks like noticing your breath. Other days, it’s recognizing that you need rest or movement. Both count.
If your nervous system feels overstimulated, our nurse practitioner can help explore how chronic stress and cortisol dysregulation might be affecting your ability to rest and focus.
You’re Not “Bad” at Mindfulness
Meditation isn’t a test of willpower—it’s a relationship with your body. If sitting still feels hard, it doesn’t mean you’ve failed; it means your body is still learning that it’s safe to relax.
Healing takes practice, not perfection.
If you’d like support learning nervous system-safe mindfulness tools, you can book a free 15-minute consultation with one of our trauma-informed therapists. Together, we’ll create a gentle approach that helps you feel calmer, safer, and more connected—without forcing stillness your body isn’t ready for.
